Becoming a parent is transformative…
but it can also leave you feeling vulnerable, overwhelmed, and uncertain. It’s a time of adjustment—of learning how to care for a newborn while managing your own physical recovery, sleep deprivation, and the shifts in your relationships. On top of these challenges, societal expectations, social media portrayals, and external judgment can often make this journey feel even more difficult. Parenting is filled with contrasts—moments of joy and frustration, closeness and the need for space. Both are valid, but they can be difficult to reconcile in a world that often expects constant joy and selflessness from new parents.
These feelings are all normal, and both are valid. Yet, society often expects new parents to be constantly joyful and selfless, which can leave you feeling isolated or unsure when your reality doesn’t align with these ideals.
You Are Not Alone
The reality is that you're not alone in feeling overwhelmed or uncertain. With so many differing opinions about what’s “right” or “best,” it can feel hard to know what to trust or where to turn.
So how do you navigate this time with more ease and kindness toward yourself? One way that can help is understanding your values—what truly matters to you and your family. By understanding your values, you can make choices that feel right for you, rather than feeling weighed down by external expectations. When you focus on your values, the difficult decisions don’t feel so overwhelming because they are rooted in what is meaningful to you, not an unrealistic standard set by society.
Along with reflecting on your values, self-compassion is a key practice to help you navigate the postpartum journey with gentleness and care. It’s all too easy to be hard on yourself during this time—striving for perfection, feeling like you should be doing everything “right.” But the truth is, perfection isn’t possible, and it’s okay to not have everything figured out.
Self-compassion means treating yourself with kindness and understanding, especially when things don’t go as planned. It’s about acknowledging your struggles without judgment and giving yourself permission to have difficult days. By practicing self-compassion, you remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can in a challenging time—and that’s more than enough. You deserve to be kind to yourself, to give yourself grace, and to embrace the ups and downs of this journey.
Living by Your Values, Not Society’s Expectations
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsure, know that you don’t have to do this alone. I’m here to offer a space that is safe, caring, and free from judgment—where you can explore your feelings, clarify your values, and develop strategies to help you navigate this challenging time.
Written by Kamellia Trebilco